almost two years of Christ-centred, gospel-centric, sound doctrine, and i've just come to the realisation of how that has shaped how i think even subconsciouly and refined my view of God. Thank God!


Reminded on Sunday about how i have placed too much emphasis on the meaning of my work and how it can impact or shape people, as well as how able i am to work and do a good job that i can be proud of. notice the number of 'I's? Indeed, how insidiously idolatry has crept into my heart, and how quick I am to place various things above God, to build my identity on things other than God alone. Time and time again, i catch myself doing this. Even my own ideas of 'self-worth' and 'self-esteem' have become my sources of identity. (thank God for the book study on sunday and Mark Driscoll's words to jot me once more)


But what is my identity in? It's in the fact that I am a child of God, and that I am created "continuously outpouring", and an image bearer of God. my deepest identity should and must be found in my relationship and service to God, in His love and in being His. As Keller says:

"Remember this - if you don't live for Jesus you will live for something else. If you live for career and you don't do well it may punish you all of your life, and you will feel like a failure. If you live for your children and they don't turn out all right you could be absolutely in torment because you feel worthless as a person.  

If Jesus is your centre and Lord and you fail Him, He will forgive you. Your career can't die for your sins. You might say, 'If I were a Christian I'd be going around pursued by guilt all the time!' But we all are being pursued by guilt because we must have an identity and there must be some standard to live up to by which we get that identity. Whatever you base your life on - you have to live up to that. Jesus is the one Lord you can live for who died for you - one who breathed His last for you. Does that sound oppressive?"

And so, what am I but an empty jar of clay apart from what He has put in me - His all surpassing power? And I have nothing to boast of but of my weakness and inabilities and failings. For when I am weak, that's when He is strong. Oh, that He may be glorified through me! 


// Take my body, build it up. may it be broken as an offering of love.
for i have nothing, i have nothing without You//


Sharon reminded me today of what we both felt God was saying at the beginning of this year - The Lord is my Shepherd. 9 months into 2011, Lord, thank You. 
May You continue to reveal the Shepherd heart of the Father in the coming months.